I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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