it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize