he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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