This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
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I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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