I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
