well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
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