You can't motorboat a personality
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
