What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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