you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
