What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
