I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
