this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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