life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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