I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
