when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
