I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Randomize
