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• (903): View more from Texas

  ....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  just looked at his mug shot... not really my type

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?

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• (631): View more from New York

  So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"

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• (207): View more from Maine

  HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar

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  These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Gay?

  (226): View more from Ontario

  German.

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Pity.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.

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