i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize