shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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