why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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