there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize