She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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