So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
