theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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