I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
