he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
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I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
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Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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