Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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