Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
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