sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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