ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
This house was built for laser tag.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
