Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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