I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
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