Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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