he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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