Swine flu. Run for my life!
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Dignity is for republicans.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
