i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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