so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
