I think i sorta joined a cult last night
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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