Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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