Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
she pinky promised me she was 18
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
