I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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