just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I am midnight drunk by noon
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
