She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize