Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Randomize
