it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
