Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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