Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
