I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
