Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
