Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
