I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
